Fan Comic

MrC

Well-Known Member
Credits
2,850
This is a fanmade sprite comic I made using sprites from http://spriters-resource.com/ . I'm not very good at this, but I want to know what others think of my work. enjoy the comic and maybe give me a bit of criticism/tips on how to improve perhaps? I'll be making more pages later on hopefully.

CoopartolChronicalsEp1.png
 
Well, he got fired in the end. And good gosh! Dat legs.
 
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Well, he got fired in the end. And good gosh! Dat legs.


Dat legs? <--- I'm confused now.

My only tips would be maybe make the text colors more character-specific. Chompy and Coopatrol were not distinguishable on who was talking. Unless you stated the other's name in the sentance, that is. Also, I don't know if you were parodying Cooper and Koopa but it is Koopatrol in the games. And a editor or a second look over would be advisable. Breakfest should be breakfast and Coopatrol was not capitalized in the second sentence by Bill. Bowser's name also was not capitalized in the opening statement. One last piece of advice would be to add a little drop shadow under the characters to give them a bit more life.

Other than that, I actually got a laugh out of this and liked it. It made me think "I've had those days..."

Actually, I see a few more grammatical errors. I won't point em all out, but yeah, grab an editor or give it another look over. If it is going to be online presentation is key.
 
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Well, he got fired in the end. And good gosh! Dat legs.


Dat legs? <--- I'm confused now.

My only tips would be maybe make the text colors more character-specific. Chompy and Coopatrol were not distinguishable on who was talking. Unless you stated the other's name in the sentance, that is. Also, I don't know if you were parodying Cooper and Koopa but it is Koopatrol in the games. And a editor or a second look over would be advisable. Breakfest should be breakfast and Coopatrol was not capitalized in the second sentence by Bill. Bowser's name also was not capitalized in the opening statement. One last piece of advice would be to add a little drop shadow under the characters to give them a bit more life.

Other than that, I actually got a laugh out of this and liked it. It made me think "I've had those days..."

Actually, I see a few more grammatical errors. I won't point em all out, but yeah, grab an editor or give it another look over. If it is going to be online presentation is key.


Yeah I intentionally made his name start with a "C". Thanks for viewing and lending your advise! :D I'll defiantly work on my grammar!
 
Well, he got fired in the end. And good gosh! Dat legs.


Dat legs? <--- I'm confused now.

My only tips would be maybe make the text colors more character-specific. Chompy and Coopatrol were not distinguishable on who was talking. Unless you stated the other's name in the sentance, that is. Also, I don't know if you were parodying Cooper and Koopa but it is Koopatrol in the games. And a editor or a second look over would be advisable. Breakfest should be breakfast and Coopatrol was not capitalized in the second sentence by Bill. Bowser's name also was not capitalized in the opening statement. One last piece of advice would be to add a little drop shadow under the characters to give them a bit more life.

Other than that, I actually got a laugh out of this and liked it. It made me think "I've had those days..."

Actually, I see a few more grammatical errors. I won't point em all out, but yeah, grab an editor or give it another look over. If it is going to be online presentation is key.


Yeah I intentionally made his name start with a "C". Thanks for viewing and lending your advise! :D I'll defiantly work on my grammar!



I look forward to seeing more. The only sprite-based comic I know that did well as a webcomic was Bob and George bobandgeorge.com so seriously, best of luck! :3
 
Well, he got fired in the end. And good gosh! Dat legs.


Dat legs? <--- I'm confused now.



I was referring to the Turkey looking Shy Guy's legs. Seeing how thin and small they were compared to his body made me laugh.
 
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Well, he got fired in the end. And good gosh! Dat legs.


Dat legs? <--- I'm confused now.



I was referring to the Turkey looking Shy Guy's legs. Seeing how thin and small they were compared to his body made me laugh.


LOL Does he even HAVE legs? And by the way, I love the new icon.
 
Thanks, I made it a while back. I've had this up before. Just decided to put it back up because I love to have the goldness once in a while. It's just based off an enemy Gold Goomba which I edited in by giving him the hat I gave to the other avatar I previously had.
 
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:p creative goomba design. btw i made a second comic! http://nintendo3dscommunity.com/gallery/sizes/5088-coopatrol-chonicals-ep2/large/



LOL I love the end of the new one. A couple of tips; 1) bBowser's text should be above Coopatrol's. Always up to down, left to right just like a novel when arranging text - even in a word balloon. 2) The Joe part... the panel before you have him saying "hey Bill" and then the two Shy Guys are saying Joe but Coopatrol is saying Bill still. It would make more sense if you changed "Joe" to "Bill" in the Shy Guy dialogue..

But here's a concept for you... what happens when the Shy Guy named Bill meets a bullet Bill?

Coopatrol: "Hey, Bill?"

Bill and Bullet Bill: "What?"

O.O OMG! A bullet Bob... Shy Guy : "I'm Bill" Bullet Bill: "I'm Bullet Bob" Bob-omb: "I'm Rob-omb"

Sorry... my mind went on a tangent.

Great job though.
 
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