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Death: Evening, short-lived beings. I am manifesting here today to dispel a vicious rumor that has been spread recently.
[An extreme closeup of his skull. His eyes glow red.]
Death: I am not a fool.
[The camera zooms out again.]
Death: But for the sake of intelligent discourse, which I am known to enjoy, I shall now explain why my assertion is true.
[The camera follows Death as he floats up to a clock tower.]
Death: To help me with this demonstration, I have requested the assistance of a demon. Say hello to the mortals at home, Zephyr.
Zephyr: Whatever.
Death: That's the spirit. Now, I have here a deck of cards.
Killer Clown: Hey! I was looking for...
Death: This is not your deck. Perhaps you would still have one if you would stop throwing your cards away.
Killer Clown: Aww...
Death: I find little enjoyment in mere children's games. My interest is fate. And I have chosen an appropriate deck for this purpose.
Zephyr: Is this gonna take long?
Death: Not at all. I have a card for you.
[He hands it to Zephyr. Zephyr immediately brightens up.]
Death: I know you're dying to explain just what is on the card you now possess. Please tell the mortals at home what it reads.
Zephyr: ZA WARUDO!
[The room's colors go negative.]
Death: The temporal effect was unnecessary. I am immune to such effects. The clown over there, though, is less fortunate.
Zephyr: May I kill him?
Death: If you wish.
[Zephyr starts throwing knives into midair, where they freeze.]
Death: This is the 21st major arcana of the tarot deck, known as The World. It is often associated with success. Not that Zephyr would know anything about success, would he?
Zephyr: The albino beat you up, too.
Death: ...moving on, there are many more cards available in this deck. Let us look at a few of them.
[He pulls out a pile of fourteen.]
Death: I am currently holding cards 0 through XIII. Now, you may have noticed that we are standing in front of a clock.
Zephyr: Time is good.
Death: It is also short. So, while you're not doing something else, why don't you put cards I-XII on the clock where they belong?
Zephyr: Is this gonna do something cool?
Death: No. It merely makes my speech look more clever and keeps you from saying things.
Zephyr: Grrr...
[He starts placing them on the clock.]
Death: I now have two cards left. Let's look at unlucky XIII first.
[He turns it over.]
Death: Death. One of my favorites, for obvious reasons. Some say it refers to change. I say it refers to an inevitable end.
Zephyr: Death 13? I love that one!
Death: Nonsense. You're dreaming. And the last remaining card is 0, which doesn't even deserve a Roman numeral.
[He turns it over.]
Death: The Fool. This, on the other hand, represents the beginning, as well as happiness and immaturity.
Zephyr: I'm finished!
Death: Case in point.
Zephyr: Hey! That's the one that stupid dog used to impersonate me!
Death: ...why did I give him permission to make these references?
Zephyr: So, in summary, you're saying that The Fool is the beginning, Death is the end, and the two shall never meet?
Death: Precisely. Thus, I am not a fool.
[The room returns to its natural color.]
Killer Clown: GAH! THE PAIN! AHHHHHHHHH!
Death: Nicely timed.
Zephyr: And I have countered your argument. The fool has met his death.
Death: ...
Death: Evening, short-lived beings. I am manifesting here today to dispel a vicious rumor that has been spread recently.
[An extreme closeup of his skull. His eyes glow red.]
Death: I am not a fool.
[The camera zooms out again.]
Death: But for the sake of intelligent discourse, which I am known to enjoy, I shall now explain why my assertion is true.
[The camera follows Death as he floats up to a clock tower.]
Death: To help me with this demonstration, I have requested the assistance of a demon. Say hello to the mortals at home, Zephyr.
Zephyr: Whatever.
Death: That's the spirit. Now, I have here a deck of cards.
Killer Clown: Hey! I was looking for...
Death: This is not your deck. Perhaps you would still have one if you would stop throwing your cards away.
Killer Clown: Aww...
Death: I find little enjoyment in mere children's games. My interest is fate. And I have chosen an appropriate deck for this purpose.
Zephyr: Is this gonna take long?
Death: Not at all. I have a card for you.
[He hands it to Zephyr. Zephyr immediately brightens up.]
Death: I know you're dying to explain just what is on the card you now possess. Please tell the mortals at home what it reads.
Zephyr: ZA WARUDO!
[The room's colors go negative.]
Death: The temporal effect was unnecessary. I am immune to such effects. The clown over there, though, is less fortunate.
Zephyr: May I kill him?
Death: If you wish.
[Zephyr starts throwing knives into midair, where they freeze.]
Death: This is the 21st major arcana of the tarot deck, known as The World. It is often associated with success. Not that Zephyr would know anything about success, would he?
Zephyr: The albino beat you up, too.
Death: ...moving on, there are many more cards available in this deck. Let us look at a few of them.
[He pulls out a pile of fourteen.]
Death: I am currently holding cards 0 through XIII. Now, you may have noticed that we are standing in front of a clock.
Zephyr: Time is good.
Death: It is also short. So, while you're not doing something else, why don't you put cards I-XII on the clock where they belong?
Zephyr: Is this gonna do something cool?
Death: No. It merely makes my speech look more clever and keeps you from saying things.
Zephyr: Grrr...
[He starts placing them on the clock.]
Death: I now have two cards left. Let's look at unlucky XIII first.
[He turns it over.]
Death: Death. One of my favorites, for obvious reasons. Some say it refers to change. I say it refers to an inevitable end.
Zephyr: Death 13? I love that one!
Death: Nonsense. You're dreaming. And the last remaining card is 0, which doesn't even deserve a Roman numeral.
[He turns it over.]
Death: The Fool. This, on the other hand, represents the beginning, as well as happiness and immaturity.
Zephyr: I'm finished!
Death: Case in point.
Zephyr: Hey! That's the one that stupid dog used to impersonate me!
Death: ...why did I give him permission to make these references?
Zephyr: So, in summary, you're saying that The Fool is the beginning, Death is the end, and the two shall never meet?
Death: Precisely. Thus, I am not a fool.
[The room returns to its natural color.]
Killer Clown: GAH! THE PAIN! AHHHHHHHHH!
Death: Nicely timed.
Zephyr: And I have countered your argument. The fool has met his death.
Death: ...
